Okay so the current situation is that I was overweight for the last few years of my life I am now 19 and a man, I have been working on myself and lost a lot of weight, I was taking appetite suppressants to curb my binge eating habits and it has work SO well but I’m still not at my ideal body image or ideal weight for my frame. Ive had a few comments from family members that I shouldnt lose any more weight and I need to stay with where im at. I don’t think it’s their place to decide what I should do with my body and if my looks dont fit into their narrative then that is not my problem. Would I be an asshole if I told them to stop commenting about my body?
NTA but do take your health into account. I’m sure their comments are coming from a place of love and concern, but I don’t blame you at all for being irritated. In the end, if there’s any doubt, you should check in with a doctor to make sure you’re in a good place. Congrats on the self improvement!
I have been to the doctors a few times in the last few months and no issues have been found! So I’m very pleased and proud of myself! Thank you so much for your kind words 😀
And the truth is people do a lot of disorganized stuff around weight loss and body image.
The same people who were teasing you about being heavier will tell you that you look ill when you’ve lost weight bc now they’re the heavier person.
Or they want to keep the person destabilized at will.
OP you’re doing everything right and right fir yourself.
They are going to push back in hundreds of ways.
“I’m not interested in talking about my body or my weight.”
“Going forward, I’m not talking about my body or my weight ”
“I’m not interested in discussing that ”
“Please don’t comment on my body ”
All perfectly reasonable.
Anyone who tries to push, just say, “I said no.” As you walk away.
NTA nobody should be making unsolicited comments about others bodies. On the flip side, I just hope you’re not falling into any issues with body dismorphia/EDs. I have to take you at your word but it could also be like that episode of American Dad where Stan becomes anorexic
NTA
It’s perfectly reasonable for you to not want people talking about your body and to tell them to stop it if they do. Be prepared for push-back when you ask them to stop gossiping about you; they almost certainly won’t like it and will tell you you’re being unreasonable and all sorts. All you can do is say that you’re not prepared to be around them if they’re going to talk about you like that, and then if they insist on doing so you will have to leave. If you look at the Captain Awkward website you’ll find lots of advice on this.
Well done for losing the weight that you have. And good on you for recognising that boundaries exist for a reason. I hope they listen to you.
NAH
I think the safety of trusted people keeping us from body dysmorphia is worth the annoyance of it.
People rapidly changing their bodies (whether it’s sudden weight gain, weight loss, or radical plastic surgery) have a known problem with accurately seeing their bodies as they truly are. It’s a well known risk.
Sure it’s annoying, but family is there as a safety net.
Family can tell us things no one else can (your dress is see through at the back, your breath stinks, you have sauce on your top, you’re racist). The benefits outweigh the annoyance.
This \^\^\^\^ 100%.
It is far too easy to swing from one eating disorder (overeating) to another (undereating).