I am a 20F. I live in a 3 bedroom apartment lived in by 5 familial people including myself. I moved into this apartment as a minor because of events that aren’t relevant.
Recently, my grandmother got a letter in the mail from our housing development stating that the space we share will be reduced to a two bedroom because only two people are on the lease right now (my grandma and my uncle), unless they find a third person to sign on. Here’s the living arrangement currently:
I share a room with my grandma.
My uncle who’s on the lease has his own room, but he’s nearly 50 and on disability so this isn’t his fight.
My brother, who’s 28 and isn’t on the lease but he basically lives out in the open living room, so I personally believe he has less responsibility
And finally, my cousin.
Who’s a 28 year old male, has his own room in this apartment, and isn’t on the lease.
Can you see why i’d be hesitant yet?
As for me, i’m still working out my situation. I’m actively in job training and will hopefully get a permanent job soon after so i’m not trying to be a leech. I asked my grandma why not consider the other two (my brother and my cousin) to sign the lease and the reason she gave me is because "they’re grown".
…Yet i’m 20? Am I not grown as well?
I don’t know. I’m still not convinced. I wanna put my foot down on this because if anything, my cousin is a leech (he has his own room, doesn’t pay rent, eats the food in the fridge, uses the utilities without paying, and recently told my mom that he didn’t want to work for a company she wanted to refer him to because he heard they had a "bad reputation" amongst employees.)
So basically, I’m at a loss. WIBTA for not agreeing to sign on?
Your cousin should definitely step up first.
NTA, brother or cousin can cosign. You are youngest. Do not limit yourself by signing. Tell them if you do, you get cousin’s room.
that’s what i’m thinking. tbh i’ve kinda been salty over the past few years i lived here because he had his own room and not me, so im thinking “get him to sign the lease instead, and if not him and you want me to be on it, give me his room”. hopefully this will be a huge step in getting it into his head he needs to spread his wings and be out of grandmas house YESTERDAY
This, but OP, get the room before you sign. Have all your stuff moved in and a small lock installed before you sign a blessed thing.
NTA definitely sounds like the guy with the third room should sign on because well he as a full room. the only reason why he shouldn’t is because he has a criminal record or something that would make him ineligible to reside there. But then again there’s the second man who could sign on.
If your name is on the lease, you will have your own room.
If you don’t have your own room, your name will not be on the lease.
Your cousin has his own room, he should be on the lease.
YWNBTA
Your brother or your cousin are the ones who should be added to the lease, not you.
I am confused about why someone being a grownup means they should not be on the lease. I do know that, for instance, a child can stay on their guardian’s health insurance plan until they are 26, but after that they are no longer eligible. Does your grandmother think that if the ‘fully adult’ people are on the lease, your family will be charged rent or receive less assistance?
NTA
“grandma, thank you for letting me stay here. I will consider signing the lease if I get the third bedroom to myself and we split the rent 5 ways.”
But you should look into other living situations.
Every rental I’ve ever had every adult living there had to be on the lease otherwise you were in violation. You may want to consider that and read it to see.
NTA. Do NOT sign that lease!!! Your cousin is the one who has the third room, and should be the third person on the lease. I don’t understand why your grandmother doesn’t understand that….
NTA. The 28 yo with his own room should be first in line. First of all, if the flat is reduced to two bedrooms, he’s going to lose his room, while you can still share with grandma. Second, having his own room, he benefits more from the current situation. The fact that your grandma considers him grown and you not grown should be enough to make him the obvious signatory. Please refuse to sign.
It’s unclear if this is a market rental or if it is a situation where the government is subsidizing the rent. If it is a subsidized apartment, not reporting the actual number of people living in the unit is actually fraud and clearly violated Federal housing subsidy program rules. For most subsidized housing, the tenant pays a portion of the rent commensurate with their income, whether it be from employment, social security, disability or any other source. Size of the apartment the agency is willing to subsidize is also according to specific rules. If the number of people and their income from all sources is not reported accurately, your grandmother can lose her housing benefits.
NTA. As a mostly agreeable girl and later woman, I’ve been on the receiving end of these kinds of requests a lot. The reason she is asking you is that you are easy to talk to and direct to shut up while the other two are not. You are the gentle young lady that can be bullied into giving everything for nothing so the status remains quo. Because if you sign that lease and they can’t make rent, that becomes your problem.
If your grandma and uncle could reign in your cousin and get him to pay his fair share, they would have. If they thought they could get your brother to sign up to pay for a room without actually taking the room(because of the cousin situation), they would have. They are hoping they can get you on the hook for a third of the apartment without you demanding the third of the apartment that being on the lease entitles you to.
In reality, they need to tell the cousin that if he doesn’t sign up for the room, he’s losing it. If the landlord demands a third person sign up for the third room and the lease is structured that they can do that, then someone has to do it. If not a member of your family then a stranger. Your brother’s living room situation might also be at stake but let’s be real here, this is a cousin issue. Don’t let them tell you that you need to say something, this is on your grandma and uncle to handle this.