I (F34) work in public administration. My workplace has approximately 30 employees.
I have to give you a bit of a context first. Since about 10 years we’ve had managers come and go and the trust between the management and the employees are very low, in both directions. There is very little dialogue and the communication mainly happens through email. Throughout the recent years there has been may cutbacks at our workplace that has had a big impact on our work environment and the overall satisfaction among the employees. Which has led to higher stress, people quitting, long term sick leave and so on.
With more people in distress at the workplace the
more critical the employees got, the more management reprimanded us or pulled away from us. Fast forward to today there is hardly any direct communication between management and us employees. As long as we get the work done, we don’t hear from anyone.
Now to the situation in question. We recently got an email from management telling that they will cut a very important resource from us, not due to budget constraints but because they want to prioritize other things. It didn’t say what other things. That left us very confused, angry and sad. Some could hardly do any work that day. This resource has been a tremendous support for our wellbeing at work.
I encouraged my colleagues to go talk with the management and tell how we feel. Most didn’t want to, or dared. Some said that it wouldn’t make any difference.
So I offered to write our feelings down and hand it as a letter to the management. I only involved the ones who were openly critical about the cut. Which were around half of us. The points we made were clear. Not mean, but not nicely put either. Just very direct and transparent, like this is how we feel and why. We made no personal attack, we addressed it to the management as a whole. I was the one who handed over the letter.
A few days later the whole workforce were called to a meeting in which the letter was discussed, but now it was called a list of protest. Management said that this letter was a violation of work policies, and that we had violated our employee agreements. They also said that some employees had been pressured to leave statements and that the purpose was to put management in a bad light. It was not true. I was in chock, we had no such intention. Nobody of my colleagues said a word, it was totally silent.
I was the one who handed over the letter, I got the blame. Now since then , one of our managers don’t say hello to me or looks at me. I have been home from work for days since I feel so ashamed. I haven’t slept. I love my job, even with all the bad that’s going on, but I don’t know if I can continue working there. I tried to explained to one of my bosses how I feel and that my intentions were never to hurt. but he only responded with “too bad you feel like that”.
I start to feel that what I did was truly wrong.
Am I to blame here? AITA
What’s the resource? Free lunch? Gym membership? On site massage?
It’s regular counseling with a licensed therapist.
I realize this doesn’t answer your question, but, based on my own experience, I’d be wary of any kind of therapist that was working for my employer. Here’s why: I used to be employed in a place where all the people in my group had undergone an extremely violent traumatic experience at work where some of our coworkers were killed.
The bosses brought in a therapist who was supposed to help us deal with the aftermath. We had to sit in a circle with this man who encouraged us to talk about our feelings and any problems we were having etc., etc. I got a bad vibe from the man and kept quiet throughout the whole meeting.
People were letting everything out, crying, pounding their feet, baring their emotions, baring their souls. They just poured their insides out to him. People expected that what they told him would be confidential, but no. Turned out he recorded everything and reported it to the higher-ups in our company.
I’m so sorry to hear that happened to you. I am wary of what I share in counseling and what I don’t share, also because it’s a group setting. It is strictly confidential but I am also aware of that the therapist reports back to management.
However, the counseling has been a mandatory part of work in all the years I’ve been there (11). The current therapist has been with us for years, so I trust her.
Here’s to why we feel that we need counseling in order to do the job; We deal with difficult tasks helping people who’s been victim of different kinds of abuse and violence. Even children. Some of the things I hear and see in my day to day work you wouldn’t believe. People can be cruel to one another.
That’s horrific in so many ways.
My own experience with workplace support programs (just for work and life stress, nothing like your experience) was the opposite – a seemingly totally confidential talk with a proficient and well-meaning professional who I otherwise would have needed funding or diagnoses to afford.
NTA You did nothing wrong, management didn’t want to hear what you had to say, they wanted you to just suffer quietly like you have been. They didn’t like being told the decisions they’re making have an impact on their staff so they took your letter in bad faith. Saying people “felt pressured” is just a way to sow discord and distrust between you and is a common union busting tactic – even if the you’re not discussing unionizing, management generally doesn’t like when employees work collectively to voice concerns and complaints.
If you have a copy of your employment contract (or can get a copy of it from HR) go over it and see where making concerns known to management is forbidden. You did not threaten a strike, so they can’t make that claim. If possible see if a labor or employment lawyer would be willing to offer a consultation to go over it with you.
I’m not sure where you’re located, or if doing so is safe (physically and financially), but don’t stop speaking up for yourself and your coworkers. Attend board meetings (you said you’re in public administration, that generally means board meetings are open to the public, but, again, I’m not sure where you’re located or the specifics of the agency you work for), look into unionizing or other (legal) collective actions. If strikes aren’t allowed due to your contract, organize a “sick out” where everyone, or the majority of the staff, call out at the same time.
I know it doesn’t feel like it, but you did the right thing. They wouldn’t have objected so forcefully if they didn’t think you had legitimate complaints and weren’t afraid of collective action.
ETA: It’s perfectly ok if you don’t have the stomach for this. Confronting those in power isn’t easy work, especially when it could mean your livelihood or that of others, so please don’t feel any shame if you need to back away from being The Face and The Voice of your coworkers, but, please, don’t let management’s actions deter you (plural) or fracture your collective cooperation. There may well be someone who *can* be The Face and The Voice just waiting to be tagged in.
YTA. Have you never heard what happens to the ” messenger”. Now is the time to go to work. If you believe in that letter then why you hiding. If you dont think you did anything wront but telling management then stop hiding and go to work
If they are retaliating against you for discussing working conditions with your coworkers and raising those concerns with management, that might be illegal. Depends on the exact details. Very sketchy at least. Might want to get a consult with a lawyer.
NTA – if your view on this is correct and unbiased, your management are looking to war rather than talk, so keep that in mind before you make your next move in (or away from) that company.
I’ve worked management before, and my guess is that (rightly or wrongly) they sat around with the letter and said ‘that complaint sounds like him, that one is definitely her’, etc, etc, and they will be coming back at you not just as a group, but as individuals.
I agree. They could easily have started a dialogue with us instead. They could have just asked us what the intent was. Instead they assumed the worst. Which is a bit strange because we have nothing to gain from making a fight or doing harm to the management. That would be stupid since they are in control of our wages.
They choose the hard stance instead of dialogue. That’s also why I’m unsure what my next move should be. Stay silent and just endure or to leave? I don’t want to leave, but that might be the smart move.