I was in Denny’s at like 3 AM this morning. We go to pay the bill. A guy (dunno if he was homeless or not) asked to use the restroom. The waitress said it was for paying customers only and was a bit rude to him. I tried to sneakily tell him the code as I used the rest room earlier. I apparently was not sneaky enough because the waitress heard me and got very upset. The guy was very polite and he did leave without trying to use the restroom.
I have medical issues (Crohn’s disease) which make urgent restroom something I’ve dealt with in the past. I’ve literally had accidents in the middle of stores because I was refused restroom access, so I’m very sympathetic on this issue.
Was I wrong to try to help the guy out?
YTA
You meant well, and that’s kind of you. But, you shouldn’t try to defeat the restaurant’s rules. If it happens again, drop $2 for a cup of coffee for the person and then they’re a paying customer.
Yta do you clean those bathrooms? You don’t work there. Mind your business in situations that don’t concern you.
From the couple of comments I’ve seen already, I think the right answer would have been to buy the guy something small so he could use the restroom. That absolutely didn’t occur to me in the moment, but it definitely will if this ever happens in the future. Thanks!
YTA: While your medical issues and associated plight are very sympathetic, the employee you are dealing with does not set the policy, and can be in trouble if they are caught waiving said policy. The easy way around this would have been to buy the person a slice of pie or a drink, thus making them a customer. Also you can voice your concerns about the policy and your issues with it to the company in hopes that your opinion and potential spending sways them to make a change in the future, but would still not be effective in the moment unless you brought it to a manager with the authority to waive said policy.
You’re absolutely right about buying him something. I wish I’d thought of that in the moment.
YTA. You chose to violate rules that you have no say in.
Business that use key/code locks on their bathrooms usually do so because (a) they’re required to do so by corporate policy and/or (b) they’ve had problems in the past.
You aren’t the one who has to clean that bathroom if someone abuses it.
(BTDT – been there, done that – ecch.)
Regardless of your intentions, it isn’t your place to break their rules.
YTA.
YTA. Most places have policies like that for a reason, and it isn’t just hostility to homeless people. They don’t want people overdosing in their bathrooms because they are going in there to shoot up. It happens more often than most people would think, especially in cities or impoverished high crime areas. My brother worked at a Walmart in a not so great area and they literally trained them on how to deal with this situation.
YTA- You meant well, but also be mindful that it was 3AM. I personally don’t mind those policies being enforced during late nights that help protect the staff and customers.
NTA When rules don’t allow for human decency.
YTA
You were trying to be nice. Sadly places have these rules in place for a reason. You aren’t the one that needs to clean it up if the bathroom is abused or worse case the people does drug and overdose
Drop a two dollar coffee next time, so they will be a paying customer
Also it was 3am, people are much more wary about that in the middle of the night
YTA – I feel its a good rule of thumb that if you feel like you need to do something in a “sneaky” way you already know full well that you aren’t supposed to be doing it.
I know it may seem capricious or even cruel to have strict bathroom policies, but you also don’t know why they are in place. It could be that they have had bad experiences in the past and have decided they can’t make exceptions. It could also be that they are just being petty and bureaucratic.
So technically YTA, but I also understand your intentions. It’s hardly a major crime and, had you succeeded in your clandestine subversion of the “policy”, the restaurant would not have suffered a catastrophe.