This is, in the grand scheme of things, a super minor issue, but my partner and I are in stark disagreement about it, so I wanted to get strangers’ opinions.
I was at the mall today and had a food wrapper that I wanted to throw away. I looked around for a while and couldn’t find any trash cans, but noticed a small one behind the information desk. I went up to the woman working there and asked if I could throw it away. She said no, kind of abruptly, and vaguely gestured to go find a bin. She might’ve been a bit annoyed.
My partner was shocked and said that was so rude of me, and was horrified that I’d asked. I said I really didn’t think it was a big deal, and he was even more surprised when I doubled down and said it wasn’t an issue. I was completely blown away that this was perceived as rude! Was I terribly rude here? It’s kind of eating away at me, and I want to know if this was a faux pas so I don’t do it again (I probably won’t anyway, but would still like to know). Thank you in advance!
You did the polite thing and asked. When your request was denied, you didn’t make a fuss. I see no issue here.
NTA. This was a common interaction where you did nothing wrong. I’m wondering why your partner sees this as rude.
Your partner is absolutely right. You should have politely crumpled the wrapper and dropped it discreetly on the floor at the feet of the woman who wouldn’t let you toss a small piece of trash in her private, personal, exclusive, ever so special trash can.
How shocking that you thought in a public place it would be acceptable to throw away a small piece of paper trash in a trash bin! What did you think the trash bin was for? Trash???
A-hem. NTA.
NTA
You were at a service based organization and you asked a representative of a service based organization to help you out, nicely.
They abruptly said “no”, you moved on without making a scene.
I dont see the problem here – your partner seems a bit obtuse.
NTA – First of all, you asked, and secondly, this is supposed to be a place for the public to ask questions or seek help.
Maybe (and that’s a big maybe) if she had said, “There is a trash can over there,” that would give you another option, but responding the way she did was rude.
I’m more down the middle on this. Should have asked at the information desk where the nearest bin is, then you would also know for next time.
The information desk attendant, if taking your trash, may then always be asked as that becomes an easy way.
NTA
Personally i don’t have a problem with you asking the woman to use her bin. If the mall had more trash cans then you wouldn’t have had to ask the woman in the first place, so the blame is on them. She can’t complain to you if her company can’t provide adequate trash cans in the mall.
INFO: what’s your partner’s reasoning for why Y T A here? Trying to figure out where he’s coming from.
He thought I interrupted the lady and that it wasn’t the right location to throw something away. He is convinced it was super rude and that I offended her — which I feel really bad about!
I will say I couldn’t find a trashcan anywhere on the floor and had to go into a restroom to find one. I don’t know why some malls do this nowadays!
Was she busy helping someone else?
I don’t see a problem here.
You asked and didn’t just like throw it over the desk in there.
NTA